24 Witty Daria Morgendorffer Quotes From MTV’s Daria

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Witty Daria Morgendorffer Quotes

Why We Love Daria Morgendorffer

Daria is everyone’s favorite moody and misanthropic teenager. Originally a character on Mike Judge’s Beavis and Butthead, Daria found her own life when she became the titular star of her own spin-off.

Voiced by Tracy Grandstaff, Daria has become a cult classic for millennials who grew up during the first round of MTV’s non-music programming. She represents everything great about being a teenager that thinks differently and doesn’t buy into the norms of high school life.

Here are twenty-four of our favorite Daria Morgendorffer Quotes! If we missed any of your favorites, let us know on social media. Enjoy!

Daria Morgendorffer Quotes

1. “Don’t worry, I don’t have low self-esteem. It’s a mistake. I have low esteem for everyone else.”

2. (To Quinn) “Sometimes your shallowness is so thorough, it’s almost like depth.”

3. “As far as I can make out, ‘edgy’ occurs when middlebrow middle-aged profiteers are looking to such the energy, not to mention the spending money, out of quote-unquote ‘youth culture’. So they come up with this fake concept of seeming to be dangerous where every move they make is the result of market research and a corporate master plan.”

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4. Scientist: Are you playing a game?
Daria: No, just talking to the computer.
Scientist: Do you always talk to your computer?
Daria: Only when the refrigerator is mad at me.


5. “I hate everybody.”

6. “I believe in coffee. Coffee for everyone.”

7. “I don’t like to smile unless I have a reason.”


8. “Why didn’t I just stay home where its nice and quiet and nothing ever happens.”

9. “All that matters in a relationship is that you like the same pizza toppings.”

10. “My goal is not to wake up at 40 with the bitter realization that I’ve wasted my life in a job I hate because I was forced to decide on a career I hate in my teens.”


11. “Stand firm for what you believe in, until and unless logic and experience prove you wrong. Remember, when the emperor looks naked, the emperor is naked. The truth and a lie are not ‘sort of the same thing’. And there is no aspect, no facet, no moment of life, that can’t be improved by pizza.”

12. “Have you ever heard the expression ‘get the hell away from me’.”

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13. “I’m not miserable. I’m just not like them.”

14. “A few days ago, my father had a heart attack, forcing me to admit his mortality to myself for the first time. Accepting this grim new knowledge has been especially difficult as I have been under constant yammering assault by two utterly brainless and talentless so-called ‘radio personalities’. And so for these reasons I, Daria Morgendorffer, am Mental In The Morning.”


15. “I’ve been busy procrastinating all day.”

16. Jane: Use your womanly attributes.
Daria: Gotcha, I’ll give birth.


17. “I’m overcome with emotion.”

18. “My hormones don’t rage. Oh sure, they get mad sometimes, but then they just stop speaking to each other.”

19. “Maybe the next book you read should be ‘When Mildly Inconvenient Things Happen To Shallow People’.”

20. “Is life always tawdry, stupid and humiliating? Or is this just a phase?”

21. Quinn: People are so weird!
Daria: Some are weird, some are just astonishingly self-centered and deceitful.


22. “I don’t like kids. I didn’t even like kids when I was a kid.”

23. Child: We’re supposed to be discussing current events.
Daria: I have a headache, is that current enough for you?

24. “If I didn’t have such low self-esteem, she might have gotten to me.”

RELATED: 23 Hilarious Jim Halpert Quotes From The Office

Witty Daria Morgendorffer Quotes

What Did You Think?

We hope you enjoyed our list of Daria Morgendorffer quotes! Do you have any favorites that we missed? Let me know on social media!

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