Meredith Quotes From The Office

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Funny Meredith Quotes The Office

Everyone says that Creed is the most depraved character on The Office. While I agree, I think Meredith (Kate Flannery) gives him a run for his money. She is one nasty chick.

Today we want to go over our favorite Meredith quotes from The Office. If we missed any of your favorites, let us know on social media. Enjoy!

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Meredith Quotes From The Office

“Hey boss, I did everything I could. I invited Pete out for drinks, I emailed him shots of my junk.” – Meredith Palmer

“I got permission to bring Jake-y into work, which is great because he got suspended this week and now I don’t have to pay for a sitter.” – Meredith Palmer

“I have this thing about men cutting or threatening to cut my throat…don’t try to cut my throat.” – Meredith

“I just feel lucky that I got a chance to share my crummy story with anyone out there who thinks they’re the only one to take a dump in a paper shredder. You’re not alone sister, let’s get a beer sometime.” – Meredith Palmer

“I just want, for once, a smart, professional, decisive, well-hung man in his forties.” – Meredith Palmer

via GIPHY

“I know who I am. Nobody’s taking Meredith Palmer to the opera to meet the queen.” – Meredith Palmer

“I’d better come out of this smelling like a rose. I’ve been on my best behavior for nine years. If it wasn’t for the cameras, I would’ve done some truly vulgar crap.” – Meredith Palmer

“I’m excited about doing the ad, but I’m not really used to doing videos with so many people around.” – Meredith Palmer

“I’ve had two men fight over me before. Usually, it’s over which one gets to hold the camcorder.” – Meredith Palmer

“In my experience, guys are way more attracted to the back of you than to the front.” – Meredith Palmer

“Let’s get some booze and some cocaine and just blow it out. No consequences.” – Meredith

“Meredith Palmer ain’t never been called no narc. Floozy? Yes. Alchie? Check. Einstein, sarcastically? You bet. But never no narc. Vomit mop? Sure. Floor meat? That’s me. Flesh hoover?” – Meredith Palmer

“Michael, you are the reason I drink. You are the reason I live to forget.” – Meredith Palmer

“Michael? You ran over me with your car. You posted a picture of my bare boobs on the bulletin board with a caption that said ‘gross’.” – Meredith Palmer

“Who’s the one who didn’t bring lice into the office? Meredith. Sure I gave everybody pink eye once, and my ex keyed a few of their cars, and yeah I BM’d in the shredder on New Years. But I didn’t bring the lice in. That was all Pam.” – Meredith Palmer

“You better fix this. I already ditched my uterus and I ain’t losing any more good parts.” – Meredith

“You guys got to try this pool. No top scum, no band-aids, this thing is choice.” – Meredith Palmer

via GIPHY

What Are Your Favorite Meredith Quotes From The Office?

We hope you enjoyed our list of hilarious Meredith quotes from The Office. Did we miss any of your favorites? Let us know on social media!

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